**Happy New Year**

Chase, my sister Miles, the boys (who are already asleep) and I are ringing in the New Year in pjs with a home cooked meal of veal picatta, sauteed spinach and fettucini alfredo.  This has been mine and my sister's favorite meal since we were probably 6 and 7 years old (no lie) so I can't think of a better way to celebrate and end 2013!  It has been a roller coaster of a year with a lot of ups and a lot of downs.  We have learned and grown so much this past year, not only in our knowledge of Autism and therapies, but also in our faith.  We have seen God's grace and answered prayers first hand and have grown stronger as a family in the midst of all the trials that 2013 threw our way.  This will most definitely be a year we will NEVER forget!  But I cannot wait to see what 2014 holds for all of us!  Thank you to everyone who has taken interest in little Chase (and all of us) and for your continued support and prayers for us on this journey!  Here's to 2014!!!

Happy Holidays From The Herndons

I just didn't have it in me to do Christmas cards this year so I created some fun digital cards on an app called Red Stamp and emailed them this year!

Appropriate Play With Toys

One common characteristic amongst children on the spectrum is their inability to play "appropriately" with toys and their lack of imaginative play.  This is one reason I think that Chase thrives and really enjoys school because it is so structured and he likes the routine and predicability from one activity to the next.  I was having major anxiety the last week he was in school before Christmas break, about the 2 weeks he would be out of school, and that all "activities & entertaining" would be on my plate.  I was worried about how I would keep him occupied and stimulated at home and I have been AMAZED at his newfound ability to play with toys and read book in an appropriate manner!   We have really been trying to limit his use of the iPad (to make it more desirable as a reward for potty training - more on that later) so it has been extra hard to find ways to keep him occupied for longer than a few minutes without that.

We bought several "Christmas presents" that we actually gave to to the boys early (when we arrived in Jackson at my parents) to keep them both occupied while we were there.  One thing Chase enjoys and actually scribbles and stamps on is the Fisher Price Doodle Pad Pro.  It has 2 little magnetic stamps and the pen with magnet tip and he scribbles all over it then actually moves the eraser across the screen like it's meant to be done! (THIS IS A HUGE STEP FORWARD!)  Another MAJOR development I have noticed lately is that when we are reading books and ask him "Where is ____?" he will actually POINT to the picture we are asking him to.  He scans the page for whatever we say and points to it!  This is HUGE!  And not just a page with 2 or 3 pictures...he will do it in books with 20-30 pictures on the page.  This is something we have worked on with him for over a year now and it just happened all of a sudden!  

Trampolines are always a favorite way for Chase to "regulate" his sensory needs.

This is EASILY both the boys favorite toy!  It occupies them longer than any other toy we own!  And I have to admit it is kind of addicting to sit there and watch the marbles go through the maze! :)  

We went for a play date over at a friend's house and she had this AMAZING play sand from Brookestone that is not messy and doesn't stick to your hands and somehow sticks together so you can mold it.  Google it.  Watch the video demo.  I'm buying some myself.  

Great for sensory and tactile too!

They also got a karaoke light machine that you can hook your phone or ipod up to and Chase was fascinated with the light show! :)  It was really fun! 

Can We Have A Holiday Do-Over???

Holidays and Expectations go hand in hand.  As a parent you have your own set of expectations about how Thanksgiving, Christmas and the holidays should go for your family.  Extended family also have their own set of expectations and demands.  Gifts to buy, gatherings and parties to attend, Christmas cards to send, decorations to put out...the lists seem to grow every year.  As does the level of stress, especially the older your children get.

Holidays with children on the spectrum add a whole other level of stress, and sometimes disappointment.  You know deep down that that they don't understand the concept of "Santa" or Christmas at all for that matter (especially at the ages our boys are currently at - 3.5 and 1.5 years).  This does makes gift buying easy (and cheaper).  Although they don't quite grasp Santa, as a parent, you still want them to wake up Christmas morning, excited with anticipation, dying to see all the cool new toys under the tree.  However; it never seems to go that way, or at least it hasn't for us, so far.  Aside from worrying how Chase would adjust away from home, out of his "normal routine", and with less structure, we have been dealing with sick kids for what seems like the whole year at this point!

So here comes our "Holiday Do-Over Wish":
This year both boys have been sick for the majority of the last 3 months.  We started with colds/crud in early October.  Miles had one ear infection that month, and then back to colds for both the boys (antibiotics for both).  At Thanksgiving we drove home on a Wednesday morning and went straight to our old pediatrician with Chase because he was so sick.  He was put on 20 days of antibiotics.  Friday morning at 8am after Thanksgiving I was at Convenient Care with Miles - another ear infection for him.  They were troopers at Thanksgiving, but daddy and I were POOPED!!!

December rolled around and I thought SURELY after both boys being on antibiotics, especially Chase, we would be well again, BUT NO, the stomach bug hit our house.  Miles had it first, then 2 days later Chase.  Luckily I only got a very mild version (this time).  2 weeks later, to the day, Miles got it again, on a Thursday around lunch.  By that night it had hit me and I was up all night.  Friday morning I was throwing up in the kitchen sink (TMI, I know) while fixing Chase's breakfast and lunch to try and get him to school and out of the germ infested house.  Miles and I were laid up in bed all morning and when big Chase dropped little Chase off at home after school he walked in and immediately started throwing up (EVERYWHERE) too!  My sister had come to help the day before with Miles and ended up with the stomach bug as well!  We were a pitiful bunch...it's a NASTY thing!  We were FINALLY all over that bug by late Saturday.  BUT, the next week the boys were both snotty and coughing AGAIN!  Sunday around 10:30pm Miles woke up HYSTERICALLY screaming for over and hour and I couldn't settle him down.  I am not usually one to freak out, but Chase and I both agreed he needed to go to the ER...so off to Vanderbilt ER I went.  Turns out it was just a severe upper respiratory infection (not a busted ear drum like I was convinced) and it was viral so no medications or prescriptions would help.  I just had to wait it out!  Nothing changed over the next few days.  Miles still had a cough and green snotty nose (and was not sleeping longer than a few hours at a time at night because he couldn't breathe) so I decided to go back to the pediatrician Friday before Christmas madness began.  I really didn't want to do any more antibiotics, if at all possible, because they had been on so many for so long.  His ears were clear and Dr. Moss agreed that a Rx wouldn't help, it was viral.  So home for Christmas we went.  I ended up going home early (on Sunday) to get out of our house and have some help with the boys, as Big C was so busy working and not home to help much (which is probably why he's the only one who has been remotely well lately).  Chase was coughing and snotty at this point too, but not NEAR as bad as Miles.  Christmas was a blur...Miles woke up screaming Christmas Eve and Christmas night so we were back on the road to Nashville Thursday morning to see Dr. Moss again.

The viral cold has now turned to Bronchitis.  Miles is on his 4th antibiotic in the last 3 months!  I'm sure I will be back at the Dr. with Chase by next week, but for now we could REALLY use prayers for everyone to get well, and hopefully stay well for a little while!  I have been pumping them full of probiotics for over a week also, trying to let this virus run its course and build back up their immune systems.  Prayers are definitely needed.

I feel like we were so worried and focused on our sick babies that Christmas just came and went with a blink.  I did manage to get a few pictures, but you will have to excuse the snotty noses in most of them! :)

Christmas Eve

 Christmas Eve

 Christmas Eve

 Christmas Morning

 Left Pic: this just about sums everything up! :)

Christmas morning

Are You AWAARE?

http://www.awaare.org/faq.htm

ABOUT AUTISM-RELATED WANDERING
Similar to wandering behaviors in seniors with dementia or Alzheimer’s, children with Autism are prone to wandering away from a safe environment. Unfortunately, many cases end in tragedy.

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WANDERING DEFINED
Wandering is the tendency for an individual to try to leave the safety of a responsible person's care or a safe area, which can result in potential harm or injury.  This might include running off from adults at school or in the community, leaving the classroom without permission, or leaving the house when the family is not looking.  This behavior is considered common and short-lived in toddlers, but it may persist or re-emerge in children and adults with autism.  Children with autism have challenges with social and communication skills and safety awareness.  This makes wandering a potentially dangerous behavior.
 Wandering may also be referred to as Elopement; Bolting; Fleeing; Running.

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IMPORTANT FACTS

• Nearly half of children with autism engage in wandering behavior
• Wandering occurs across all settings, under every type of adult supervision
• Increased risks are associated with autism severity
• Half of families report they have never received advice or guidance about wandering from a professional
• Accidental drowning accounts for approximately 90% of lethal outcomes

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WANDERING DANGERS
Drowning; Exposure; Dehydration; Hypothermia; Traffic Injuries; Falls; Physical Restraint; Encounters with strangers; Encounters with law enforcement.

All Kids Are Picky, Right?

I know a lot of mom's I talk to struggle and battle to get their children to eat at least ONE good (healthy) meal a day.  Vegetables - you may as well forget about it, if you have a child under 4 or 5.  Most of their kids have their preferred and favorite foods.  That is pretty typical of most kids.  But children with Autism are "picky" on another level.  Forget about eating out with children with Autism (aside from other issues) because chicken fingers and french fries won't cut it (anywhere)!  And cook-outs at friends' houses have to be strategically planned out, or separate meals packed, to make sure there is something my child will eat there.

Currently Chase will eat the following things:
Breakfast - Waffles (but only Eggo brand - we tried to buy the Costco/Kirkland's brand and he wouldn't touch them), Pancakes (only the microwave kind), Cinnamon Rolls (Pillsbury Flakey Cinnamon Rolls), Honey Nut Cheerios (dry), Cinnamon Raisin Toast (Pepperidge Farm Brand only - has to have the raisins)
Lunch/Dinner - Cinnamon Toast, Blueberries, Strawberries, Banana, Pineapple (sometimes), Canned Pears (sometimes), diced apples (no skin, sometimes), Grilled Cheese, Peanut Butter & Jelly (no crust), Peanut Butter toast (sometimes he will eat the crust on, sometimes not), Chick-Fil-A (chicken nuggets and fries)
Snacks - Goldfish, Vanilla Wafers (sometimes), Cheetos, Gerber Cheese Puffs, Tortilla Chips (only the Santitos $2 kind/brand)
Drinks - Juice (out of a certain type of sippy cup with a straw) & Milk (2% out of a different type of cup than the juice cup)...he won't TOUCH any other kind of liquid or drink out of any other types of cups. Period!

There was a time, when Chase started eating finger foods, that he would eat peas, carrots, turkey, mac and cheese, etc...the typical things you feed children as they enter the world of finger foods.  Eventually he started limiting the foods he would eat to the point where he pretty much only wanted waffles or pancakes (who wouldn't, right?!).  When we moved to Nashville a few months ago we were basically at that point.  I felt like a short order cook.  I tried EVERYTHING I thought he liked at EVERY meal.  I started dreading meal time like a plague!  It was literally the most stressful, miserable part of the day.  It always ended in a fight and me giving in to making waffles because I couldn't let him go to bed hungry.  With Chase being non-verbal this made the struggle of meal time and "picky-ness" even harder because he couldn't actually tell me what he wanted, I had to guess.  My grocery bill and the amount of food I wasted was horrendous!  I thought at one point that maybe him being picky was just an issue of control.  We went through a lot of change when we moved to Nashville, and maybe this was just his way of having some control over everything?

I have since learned that a lot of Chase's picky eating habits are sensory related.  He doesn't like the texture: on his fingers, lips, tongue, mouth, teeth etc.  The temperature isn't right: it's either too cold or too hot.  The smell bothers him to the point he won't even put it in his mouth.  Same with the the way it looks.  He only likes to chew on the back left side of his mouth, he doesn't like to bite in to foods with his front teeth (too sensitive).  If it doesn't look like something he is used to eating (even if it's the most delicious thing you have ever tasted) he won't put it near his mouth!  I cannot tell you how many times I have physically shoved food in his mouth because I knew IF HE JUST TASTED IT he would love it!  I'm not promoting this, but when he eats one kind of glazed donuts, and these are in a different box, but taste the exact same as the others...that's when I do it.

Shortly after we started at Brown we started feeding therapy.  And Chase started using an iPad to communicate.  One of the first things we started using the iPad for was meal time.  He now has options to choose from and a voice to tell me what he wants to eat!

First, the feeding therapy: they are working on getting him to BITE into carrots and apples with is front teeth (which after about 5-6 weeks he is consistently doing).  He is eating apple sauce (3 different flavors), tolerating Gerber Graduates fruit/veggie purees in his mouth, eating pears, and tolerating mac and cheese in his mouth.  He is also using a spoon, something we haven't been able to get him to do consistently ever.  Second, the iPad: this device has actually made meal time SO. MUCH. EASIER!!!  I cannot tell you how much stress has been taken away because of this device!  And Chase is actually eating what he chooses.  I give him 3-4 preferred options and 2-3 non-preferred options.  I usually let him start eating what he chooses and try to work in a few bites of some non-preferred food just to keep some control and try to get him to taste new things.  We use an "all done bowl" for him to spit or put food in to after he tastes it, if he won't swallow it.

For now, meal time is actually pleasant (most of the time) and his variety of foods is gradually growing!

How Did I Know?

When I first started sharing Chase's diagnosis with people a lot of them asked me how I knew to get him tested?  Believe me, we didn't (at first).  We agonized over it and read and researched endlessly online before we got a formal diagnosis.  As I stated in an earlier post, our regular pediatrician disregarded our concerns about Autism, but we did enough "online checklists" to come to our conclusions to set up an appointment with a developmental pediatrician.  Below are some links to some checklists we used.

http://www.autismspeaks.org/what-autism/diagnosis/mchat  (For Toddlers)

https://www.m-chat.org/mchat.php

An Infant/Toddler's Christmas List:

A Ten-Month-Old’s Letter To Santa

By theuglyvolvo, December 10, 2013

Dear Santa,

 I am a ten-month-old baby and I write because my mother has been sending out my “Christmas List” to people, and her list does not in any way represent the things I really want.  I could give two s#*ts about receiving stacking cups.

And I know you’re ready to make the joke about ten month-old babies and how all we want is the wrapping paper and the boxes.  Touché, Santa.  Touché.   We do, of course, want those things.  But I have a number of additional things I want very badly.

My list is enclosed below.  Have a lovely holiday.

-Ten Month-Old Baby

*          *          *

A Comprehensive List of The Things I Want For Christmas:

Dearest Santa: For Christmas, I would like the following:

*          *          *

1.) This Laptop Cord

I want this laptop cord more than I have ever wanted anything.   Please.  I also want the power strip with the orange on/off button and the white label on the other cord pictured (the one not connected to the laptop).  I would be ok with just a bunch of electrical cords in general, but I would really love these specific ones that are located behind my mother’s desk next to the air-conditioner (whose cord I also want).

*           *           *

2.) This Wall Mount Entertainment Center

I have no idea why my mother does not want me to play with this thing, as it is obviously a child’s toy.  I would like one for my room.

*          *          *

3.) House Keys

I would love a set of house keys.  To eat, obviously.  Only metal house keys will do.  Please do not buy me plastic ones.  I am not an idiot.  I know that plastic house keys are not real keys.

*            *           *

4.) Everybody’s Eyeglasses

I pull these off the face of every person I meet, only to have them pried from my fingers and reclaimed by their original owners.   I would love a pair of my own.  Again, these are going to be for eating.

*          *           *

5.) The Contents of This Thing

I would love for the contents of this thing to be emptied out onto the floor– particularly things like used, wet cotton balls and discarded pieces of floss.   If you would like to just take the contents of this bin and transfer it directly into my stocking, that would also be fine.

*          *          *

6.) Handfuls of the Dog’s Fur

This stuff is the best.  I keep trying to pull it off but she moves frequently, making collection difficult.  My favorite thing to do with it is put it in my mouth and then immediately realize that I didn’t want it in my mouth.

*          *          *

7.) The Hole in the Hallway Floorboard

Such a strange existential dilemma.  I spend hours looking at this hole and poking at it with my fingers.  I know that I cannot “have” a hole, as a hole is not a thing that can be had.  A hole is an absence.  And yet this is supposed to be a list of the things I want, and I want this hole in the hardwood floor the way Gandhi wanted peace.  The way the dog wants to lick my face.  The way my mother wants me to stop pulling off her eyeglasses.

*          *          *

8.) This Stuff, Which is All Over the Apartment

I have no idea what this stuff is.  All I know is that I want it in my hands and no sooner have I grasped its sweet, delicate softness than my mother comes running over yelling something like, “STOP TOUCHING THAT– HOW OFTEN DO I HAVE TO F*#%ING VACUUM THE G*#@&MN HALLWAY?”

*          *          *

9.) The Dog’s Food

Every time I get close to this, someone pulls me away.  If they don’t want me to eat it, why is it on the floor?

*          *          *

10.) One of These

No idea what these do, but it’s clearly a lot of fun, given that my mother never stops looking at it.

*          *          *

11.) Bobby Pins

These are my favorite!  If I had a nickel for every bobby pin I found on the floor I’d have double the number of little metal things I could put in my mouth because, go figure, I also totally love nickels.

BCA Christmas Party

School Christmas parties are just another part of the holidays this time of year.  The staff at BCA know how stressful they can be for our kiddos so they made their party extra special and familiar by having it in the classroom and having Santa come to them!  We made ornaments, crafts, sang songs, and played all kinds of games.  Miles, along with other siblings joined in on the fun and it was pretty FUNNY!  See for yourself...

 Miles holding court in CHASE'S class!

Mr. M always has to be center of attention :)

 "Hey Mom!"

 Miles making "cookies"

 Chase loves his books!

 Quiet corner

Chase says: "Ok, I think I can handle this Santa guy"

 Miles is NOT HAVING IT!!!

LOVE IT!!!  WINNING!

Jolly Ole Saint Nick

It's Christmas time, which mean SANTA!  Chase's school had a "field trip" to Green Hills Mall to see Santa.  I'll let the pictures speak for themselves! :)

 Checking out the jolly fella in the red suit.

 This is the closest M got! :)

 C wasn't interested in pictures with momma, he wanted to check out Santa too!

 Oh, HI!

 C only sees Santa with Morgan today! :)